Oh, Why Me
by TaekwondoAssKicking
Summary: War is near. Sasuke got disowned from the Uchiha. Naruto and Jiraya had a fight. Both went MIA and later KIA, but their bodies were never found. Follow the two Jounin in their epic, ridiculous, survive-or-die adventure to get home. First: Escape enemy! Story being ADOPTED by the awesome Krystal Kitsune Uchiha .
1. Chapter 1 Disowned

**Ch1. 19 Can Be Troublesome**

"No! You are an Uchiha, and therefore you are going to act like one!" Uchiha Fugaku yelled at his youngest son from across the table. Said son looked a bit... pissed. Uchiha Sasuke, recently turned 19, and just promoted to Jounin -he had been busy and couldn't participate until now- had his head down, bangs slightly covering his face and trembling from barely contained anger.

"You will break up with that...pink-haired teammate of yours! That bitch is..."

"Don't you _dare_ call Sakura that!" Sasuke yelled in return, no longer looking down. He looked straight ahead, not breaking eye contact with his furious father. At that moment, many thoughts and memories passed through Sasuke's mind. His father wasn't really there for him, it was always Itachi. Sasuke gave up in trying to be acknowledged by his father since the second test in the Chuunin Exams. _Hell, _Sasuke even kept the freakkin' Orochimaru incident a secret!

"Sakura is the nicest, strongest -literally- and most amazing person I've ever met! And you ca-"

"Enough!" Interrupted Fugaku. He looked _extremely_ pissed. "You will do as I say! I am your father and your clan leader! Show respect!" By this point, both were standing and glaring furiously at each other. Uchiha Mikoto, Fugaku's wife and Sasuke's and Itachi's mother, was sitting on one side looking rather worried, hoping Itachi that was by her side would stop them. Both agreed with Fugaku, an Uchiha should not date a Haruno. It would not last, but Uchiha have their pride. It was the look on, in both, her husband's and her son's eyes... they started yelling again.

"You will follow the clan's rules! You are part of this family, and if you continue to date _her_ you will-"

"Will what? If this is how it is, then it is better if I leave the damn clan!" Sasuke will not tolerate this! He really loves Sakura, she is his precious person, along with his best friend/rival/brother, Naruto.

"Sasuke!" Itachi joined the conversation. Sasuke turned to his older brother and mother, both of them were looking slightly disappointed. He narrowed his eyes and turned back to his father, who was shaking from anger.

"Out" He said deadly calm, with barely contained anger. "OUT OF MY HOUSE! YOU ARE NO LONGER WELCOME!" Sasuke felt himself clenching his fists.

"FINE!" And he left the house, not intending in coming back.

Later, an hour after Sasuke left, he slipped back into the house quietly through the window of his room. He packed his clothes, ninja gear, and other necessities; he even used the storage scroll that the Dobe gave him for his birthday. After Sasuke decided on what to take or leave, he climbed over the window and without glancing back, he left. This time for real.

* * *

><p>Recently promoted Jounin Uzumaki Naruto sat on his bed eating ramen. As usual. He then heard a knock coming from his door. '<em>Who is it? It's late...' <em>Naruto thought as he made his way to the door.

He opened the door to reveal none other than the Teme aka Uchiha Sasuke. One look at his eyes told him something was wrong. Very wrong. Naruto and Sasuke locked gazes.

"Want to come in?" Naruto knew that something was up with his best friend/rival/bro- err, you get it. Sasuke nodded and walked in the worn down apartment.

"I will go make some tea, don't explode my house while I'm gone!" He said as he left to do that. Sasuke smirked at that, leave Naruto to ease up any situation. In five minutes, there was warm tea on the small table, Naruto sat on one side while Sasuke sat across him.

"Sooooo! Teme! How's it going?" Naruto didn't want to pressure him. Sasuke stared at his tea, a bit sadly, and looked up.

"I-" He started saying, but Naruto interrupted him.

"Don't worry, Sasuke. I will help however I can" Naruto said surprisingly serious. Sasuke looked surprised as he blinked once.

"How di-"

"-I know something bad happened?" Naruto finished for him as he rolled his eyes, "I know you well enough, besides, what kind of teammate would I be if I didn't notice? Your eyes are a dead giveaway" Naruto gave a small smile to reassure his friend. Sasuke proceeded in explaining what happened.

"Hmmmm... So you basically got kicked out?" Naruto said thoughtfully, though slight concern tinted his voice.

"Yeah, I just can't believe it! They don't care if I'm happy..." Sasuke felt anger slowly creeping back at him.

"You had a pretty darn bad row with your dad, insulted the clan, severed all ties, and now you don't know where to go." Naruto stated seriously. "Well then, that means you will have to stay here until you find yourself an apartment!" Naruto cheerfully said. Sasuke looked at him, gratefulness in his eyes.

"Thank you" He said quietly. "Dobe"

And the moment was over.

A small tick appeared on Naruto's forehead. "Teme!" He said irritated, but both knew it was playful.


	2. Chapter 2 Apartment Hunt and unexpected

**Author's Note: **I would like to thank _TheRealGoodyTwoShoes _for helping me out. I will also take your advice of taking the dashes (-) off for the chapters to come -doing it now, actually.

Sorry for confusing you readers! And thanks for reading! Review so I know if its good or bad!

Thank you!

**PS:** This chapter has some romance, but fear not! There will be tons of action soon. I am still introducing and stuff.

* * *

><p><strong><span>Ch2. Apartment Search and the Unexpecteded<span>**

A loud snoring echoed through the run-down apartment.

Uzumaki Naruto lay on his bed, stomach upward, and lazily scratching said stomach.

Uchiha Sasuke stared at his teammate, a giant sweat drop appearing on the side of his head.

_'Dobe... like Shikamaru would say, how troublesome.' _He thought while gently shaking his head sideways. Sasuke grabbed a pillow and threw it with all his might at the Dobe's head.

"WTF!" **THUD! **Naruto yelled while falling face-first at the hard floor. "WHAT THE!? T-TEME!"

"Yes Dobe?" A smirk could be seen on Sasuke's face. He is enjoying this.

Naruto jumped up on his bed, and pointed an accusing finger down at him. "What the HELL was that for? I'll kick your sorry ass!" He said, arms flying all over the place. Sasuke smirked some more.

"You know, Dobe, you would sound much more threatening if you were actually _wearing_ some pants." Sasuke said raising an eyebrow. Naruto looks down only to find himself in underwear. He looks back up, a pout on his face.

"Gha! No fair! I'll be back in a sec." The Dobe shunshined away, and instantly reappeared, fully clothed in his Jounin uniform. The Teme blinked.

"How do you_ do_ that?" His voice laced in hidden awe.

"Do what?" He replied with his famous shit-eating grin. Sasuke rolled his eyes and spoke back.

"Come on, Sakura-chan and Miwako-san are waiting for us" Naruto instantly perked up and was out the door in a yellow flash -not Hiraishin. Sasuke once again rolled his eyes and went after his best friend.

"No, seriously, _how does he do it?_" Sasuke muttered to himself.

* * *

><p>Sasuke's girlfriend, Haruno Sakura, was sitting on a bench alongside Nara Miwako. Miwako, like Sakura, is a medic ninja, and she also specializes in katon -fire- ninjutsu plus her clan's secret shadow jutsu.<p>

"HEYA!" Naruto yelled from behind the two girls. Said girls 'eeeped' loudly and Sakura punched Naruto in the gut. Hard.

**CRASH! **And that would be poor Naruto making a pretty decent crater on the solid ground.

"S-Sakura-chan!" Naruto was on the floor, half laying down and half in a sitting position, rubbing his stomach with his hand. Sakura opened her eyes and saw her teammate on the ground.

"N-Naruto? I'm SO sorry!" She quickly apologised. A voice suddenly spoke from right behind Sakura.

"Che. The Dobe deserved it. He is the one that startled you." Said a smirking Sasuke.

"Sasuke-kun!"

Their lips locked.

"Sakura-chaaaan! Don't just ignore me!" Naruto whined while getting up. He felt someones hand on his shoulder. He looked up only to be greeted with soft, warm lips. He kissed back passionately. The two lovers gently backed away and Naruto gazed lovingly at his Miwa-chan. Miwako and Naruto met when they were 15 and 16 years old. Miwako apparently was a grade lower than Team 7 at the academy.

"Aaaaaawww! You two look so cute together!" Sakura squeled. Naruto pouted.

"Sakura-chan, the same goes for you. Though I don't know what you find in that Teme." Naruto said jockingly, grin plastered on his face.

"Guys, aren't we here for a reason...?" Miwako smiled at Sasuke.

"Yeah! We are apartment hunting for me and Sasuke-kun! Lets get going!" Sakura said radiating an aura of excitement that only girls have.

"Finally." Sasuke said looking relieved.

"Hey! I wasn't THAT bad!" Naruto punched Sasuke's shoulder friendly. Sasuke chukled slightly.

"Have you ever heard yourself?" He answered. Naruto's smile dissappeared. Bad move. Sasuke stayed in Naruto's apartment for about two weeks, ever since... the incident. Sasuke learned more about Naruto, making them closer, like real brothers. Naruto lived alone since he was six, and was lonely. Sasuke also discovered Naruto's nightmares, and by the way his breath hitched and had cold sweat all over his body; he knew it wasn't good. At all. Sasuke put a conforting hand on Naruto's shoulder and gave an encouraging nod.

This did not go unnoticed by the girls, but decided against an interrogation session.

"Sasuke! Apartment!" Sakura said in order to cheer up her teammates.

"Yeah, lets go already!" Miwako sang. Her eyes rested on Naruto worriedly but changed to happy when he smiled at her.

* * *

><p>HOURS after, both Sasuke and Sakura, found the perfect apartment. It was big enough, had fair rent, and in a decent condition.<p>

"FINALLY! It took you guys FOREVER!" Naruto whined dramatically.

"Hn. Stop whining." Sasuke said with an impasive face.

"I am not whining! I am complaining." Naruto said with a pout. Miwako an Sakura giggled. Sasuke stopped in his tracks. Eyes slightly widening. The rest of the group looked at him, then at what he was staring. They paled.

Over there, on the far side of the street was Uchiha Fugaku and Uchiha Itachi.

Ever since the fight, the Uchiha clan hates and discriminates Sasuke. Sasuke acts like he doesn't care, but his friends know that he is hurt deeply.

The two Uchihas made their way up the street, probably on Uchiha Police Force business. Sasuke stood frozen to the spot, his face emotionless, but in truth his heart was accelerating to a painful degree. When his fa- no, when Fugaku and Itachi passed by his side, Fugaku did not even spare him a glance and Itachi averted his eyes quickly. His fath- no! Fugaku's jaw was set and eyes hardened, indicating that he was absolutely _furious_ behind that impassive face. When they passed by Sakura, he gave an indignant snort. Sasuke's nails digged into his palm. When they passed by Naruto, he glared at him like all the villagers do.

Great. Another person who fears/hates the fox. But then again, whats new?

Miwako felt Naruto's hand squeeze hers. She did the same to reassure him. By then, light, thin rivers of blood were trickling down Sasuke's clenched fist. Once they were out of sight, Sasuke started walking towards their new apartment; they had to move in.

Sakura snapped out of her daze. "Oh...see ya, Naruto" She bowed "Miwako-chan" She bowed again, and left to catch up with her lover.

Naruto and Miwako stood there, watching Sasuke and Sakura embrace each other and making their way to Naruto's apartment to move Sasuke's things out.

"Hey, Naruto?" Miwako asked. He blinked, and looked into her beautiful hazelnut eyes.

"Yes?" Naruto questioned.

"Do you think its time to tell everyone about us being together?"

Naruto blinked again. A soft smile spreading on his features. Even though they've been dating for three years, it was being kept secret. Only Sasuke, Sakura, Shikamaru -for obvious reasons- and Miwako's parents knew about them.

"Yes... I think it is about time." Naruto said grinning. Miwako gave a pure happiness 'eeep!' and hugged Naruto to death. "But..." Naruto started. Miwako let go and stared at her one true love. Naruto continued, eyes glazed. "It's been three years... I was thinking we could be more-"

Naruto stopped when he saw Miwa's face. Stark white, eyes buldged. "No...nononononono! You can't! I-I love you too much! You can't be thinking..." She trailed off, horrified.

"Thinking what?" Naruto said while raising an eyebrow.

"You want to break up! I HATE YOU!" It was Naruto's turn to turn white. I hate you. Those words resounded in his head, heart clenching. Wait. Break up?

"Why you think that-" Miwako didn't let Naruto finish.

"What else could it be? You aren't looking at me! That means you are nervous as hell or something-" She raved on and on, tears starting to fall off her cheeks. Naruto's eyes widened. When she made a motion to leave, Naruto shouted out at her, completely forgetting his plans.

"I WANT TO BE TOGETHER FOREVER!" At that, Miwako turned around, confusion evident on her tear-stricken face.

"Wha...?"

"GHA! Me and my stupid huge mouth! This wasn't the way it was supposed to happen!" Naruto raved at himself, passing his hand through his messy blond hair.

"W-what are you talking about?" Miwa whispered. Naruto looked at her with a serious face, took a deep breath, and got to one knee.

He gulped nervously. "N-Nara Miwako, would you m-m-marry m-me?"

Miwako's jaw hit the ground. WTF! face and eyes widened to dramatic porportions. Naruto's hands were trembling. Fear and nervousness clear on his face. She never saw him like this. She composed herself. Has the temperature in here risen?

"I-I think I am about to pull a H-Hinata." She managed to stutter out. Naruto looked up. Miwako looked really red. Like a tomato. He looked down. His body started shaking, and tears threatened to spill from his eyes. Then suddenly, he felt hands wrap around his shoulders, and the following words made him the happiest man on Earth.

"I do." Miwako said softly, she looked at him in the eye and smiled.

"R-really?" Naruto was _**beyond**_ happy. He never felt so alive! He felt Miwa's protective embrace suddenly disappear. He looked up to see her frozen in shock.

"Miwa-chan?" Said Naruto concerned.

"Wait. Y-you just proposed. . ... YOU PROPOSED! Oh god, oh god, oh god!" Miwa was losing it. She is freaking out, arms moving at a fast speed all over the place.

She abruptly calmed down. Naruto sweat dropped.

"Oh Naruto! I love you so much! You are the only man that I would ever want to marry."

"Hehe" Naruto scratched behind the neck sheeplishly, blushing furiously.

"So, when do you want to...?" Naruto asked. Miwa looked thoughtful for a moment, then she suddenly brightened up.

"Well, our relationship is practically secret, so I was thinking that we let everyone get comfortable about us first. We will eventually tell them after a month or two, but the actual wedding..."

"I know!" Naruto said enthusiastically. "How about in a year? I would be 20 and you 19." Miwa clasped her hands together, extremely excited.

"Yes! Lets do that!" They both grinned at each other and kissed passionately under the setting sun.

* * *

><p><strong>First time EVER that I wrote something romantic... If you found it cheesy...At least it's somewhat romantic! I think.<strong>


	3. Chapter 3 At Least I Tried

**Ch3. At Least I Tried**

Uzumaki Naruto and Nara Miwako held on to each other lovingly, their eyes were closed and enjoying the sun setting over the horizon.

"Miwa-chan?" Naruto and Miwa parted slightly from one another,

Miwa looked at her fiancé tenderly.

"Yes my love?" Naruto looked a bit uncertain.

"Its just... can I at least tell the most important people to me about our plans? Please?" Miwa put a finger on her chin, eyes closed, and looked thoughtful. She opened them and a soft smile grazed her lips.

"Hmm... I want it to be a surprise, but I'm guessing you want to tell Sasuke and Sakura...?" Naruto blushed and smiled.

"Ano... Sasuke kinda knows. I told him when I got caught practicing in front of the mirror, hehehe." Naruto scratched the back of his head, a bit embarrassed. Miwa blushed and giggled.

"Aww! You practiced? So sweet!" Miwa once again looked at her Naruto-kun. She frowned.

"Naruto-kun, what's wrong?" She asked worriedly.

"Miwako" He started seriously, if not, a bit afraid. "There's something you need to know... Its about why the villagers hate me so much." Miwako looked startled, and tried to speak, only to be interrupted by Naruto. "Please listen to me and don't interrupt." He looked away, finding a certain rock interesting. "What I am about to tell you is S-class secret, only I or the Hokage can say it." Miwako´s face was void of emotion. Naruto took a deep breath. "I am the Jinchuuriki, the host to the Kyuubi." Miwako's eyes widened. Naruto's voice started trembling. "19 years ago, when the Kyuubi attacked, it was too powerful. The only way to stop it was sealing it into a newborn baby. That was me." Naruto stopped staring at the rock and looked at Miwa. She opened her mouth, then closed it. Naruto took another shaky deep breath. "If you hate me I understand." Naruto turned around and after one step, he felt something warm wrap around his torso.

"You are not the demon. I love you Naruto." Naruto's eyes widened, tears started falling off his whiskered cheeks, his body shook violently.

"T-thank you... I love you too."

* * *

><p>An hour later, a very happy Naruto was holding hands with an equally happy Miwako. They were at the park, and alone. They had important matters to discuss. "Naruto-kun, I'm telling my parents and some trustworthy clan members. Shikamaru included. You?" She asked excitedly.<p>

"Well, Sasuke knows and he will probably, no, _definitely_ tell Sakura..." Naruto trailed off. Miwa took the chance to ask him something.

"Naruto-kun, who do you want to tell?" Naruto smiled

"My family." Miwako raised her eyebrows. Naruto is an orphan, unless...

"Ero-Sennin, Iruka-Sensei, and Kakashi-Sensei.. And Tsunade Obaa-chan of course." Naruto looked up at the night sky. Miwako noticed along the years how much Naruto loves these people, it was his family indeed. Naruto looked embarrassed again. "Don't tell this to anyone but I... Iruka-Sensei is my lovable older Nii-san, Kakashi.-Sensei is somewhat an (porn-loving) uncle, Teme is the brother that I respect and want to be like him but are rivals-" Miwako giggled "-Sakura-chan is the strong sister, Obaa-chan is a motherly figure and Ero-Sennin..." He hmphed "Nah, he doesn't fit in! He is a pervert, alchohol-loving baka-"

Miwako did not let him finish. "Uhu... You know, you can't fool me! You disrespect him, debate with him, tease him like there is no tomorrow," Miwako scolded him in mock anger. "But those are not your true feelings. You do respect him, you like him, no, you simply _adore_ him! He means the world to you. I've seen it in your eyes, when you thought no one was looking." Miwa finished with a smile. Naruto looked at her surprised. A soft smile made its way to his face.

"...He is like... a father."mNaruto whispered more to himself. Miwa hugged his arm and they continued walking.

"Naruto, I think we should keep people knowing to a minimum. How about you only tell Jiraya? If thats ok with you."

Naruto nodded an affirmative. "I'll tell Ero-Sennin right now." Miwako nodded happily.

"Ok! See ya my soon-to-be-in-a-year-but-secret-for-now-husband!" She pecked him on the cheek and _shunshined_ to her house located in her clan's compound. Naruto turned around and _shunshined_ to were his perverted teacher lives.

* * *

><p>Naruto stood fidgeting in front of a door. Oh, but the door wasn't an ordinary door; it was the door that belonged to the house of his perverted sensei. The door to his doom. Naruto took one deep breath and knocked.<p>

No response.

He knocked again.

Same.

He knocked continuously and loudly, getting irritated.

_'Ok, this is getting frustrating! It ain't that late but late enough so that it is _impossible_ to peek at naked women!'_ As if on que, the dreaded door opened to reveal Jiraya looking irritated and drool could be seen across his cheek as if he fell asleep while on a desk. Probably writing Icha-Icha Paradise. Pervert.

"Naruto? What are ya doin' here gaki?" Uh oh, not in the mood. Too bad he promised Miwako-chan.

"I'm not here by choice, you Ero-Sennin!" Naruto said indignantly. Jiraya's eyebrow twitched in annoyance. "Ugh, anyways, can I come in? We need to talk..." Naruto said tiredly. At that, Jiraya seemed to wake up and nodded, letting him in. The first thing Naruto noticed when he stepped in was that the guy was fucking rich. This place wasn't big, it was _huge!_

"So what do you need to talk about?" Jiraya asked rather annoyed at his pupil right now. He was having the most erotical dream ever!

Naruto gulped. "Well, you see, Ero-Sennin, is t-that... ugh, how do I explain this?" Naruto stammered nervously and Jiraya stared, probably thinking what the hell was wrong with the Jinchuuriki. Then a light bulb seemed to go off in the perv's head.

"Naruto." He said seriously "What did you break?" Naruto blinked confusedly. "What did you break gaki, or explode is more precise?" Naruto looked angry at the implication that he exploded something. Ok, so it happened once... or twice... three? But that is not the point!

"Ero-Sennin, look-" He started, _but_.

"Don't call me that, gaki!" Jiraya said eyebrow twitching. Again.

"As I was saying, _Ero-Sennin _I- what is that?" Naruto's gaze fell upon a paper sitting innocently on the pervert's desk. Jiraya's face paled and tried to cover it up by placing random papers on top of it. Unfortunately, Naruto noticed and grasped it before it could happen. Naruto's face paled even more than Jiraya's. He was speechless, eyes widening like oranges.

First was speechlessness, then confusion, and finally; anger.

"Jiraya." Said person winced. Naruto _never_ calls him by name. "What. Is. This." It wasn't a question, but an order. Naruto's grasp on the paper tightened. On it was the following information:

_Namikaze Naruto_

_Born: October 10, 99 year of the Hidden Villages_

_Village: Konohagakure no Sato_

_Clans: Namikaze, Uzumaki (Uzumaki and Senju are known to be somewhat related)_

_Parents Info:_

_Father: Namikaze Minato, Yondaime Hokage and Yellow Flash of Konoha Village._

_Mother: Uzumaki Kushina, Bloody Red Habanero and Jounin of Konoha Village _

_(Born in Whirlpool Village, Eddies country)_

_Others: _

_Godfather: Jiraya of the Sannin_

_Important Info: Jinchuuriki of the Kyuubi no Kitsune_

Naruto stared at his _godfather._ Jiraya shuddered at the stern, emotionless, calculating look his student was giving _him_.

"Jiraya. What. Is. This." Naruto repeated emotionlessly.

"I-I, look, Naruto-" Naruto's hand clenched into a fist, he was slightly shaking by now.

"Look what?" Jiraya averted his gaze. "Look what? That I had family? An actual _clan_?" His voice was gradually rising "That information was being kept from me about my _family_?" He is now shouting "OR THAT _YOU_ ABANDONED _ME_? YOU KNOW HOW MUCH I SUFFERED? OH, AND IT GETS EVEN BETTER! MY _FATHER_ IS THE ONE THAT MADE MY LIFE MISERABLE IN THE FIRST PLACE!" Jiraya actually flinched, but he recovered and countered back.

"Naruto! Your father had to do it to save everyone and-"

"AND WHAT!? HE IS NOT MY FATHER! I HATE HIM WITH ALL MY GUT-" Naruto didn't finish courtesy of a fist colliding with his face. He fell to the ground, massaging his cheek.

"Don't you dare...DON'T YOU DARE SAY THAT! HE DIED PROTECTING THE VILLAGE! HE WAS MY MOST BELOVED STUDENT AND-" Jiraya is furious and shouting, Naruto closes his eyes and opened them, anger apparent in them.

"SO, THATS ALL I AM? A WAY TO REPAY YOUR _BELOVED _STUDENT? ALL YOU SEE IS _HIM_ WHEN YOU SEE ME? OR MAYBE ALL YOU SEE IS THE KILLER!" Both ninjas are now _beyond_ angry.

"YES! THAT'S IT! NOW GET OUT OF MY HOUSE! NOW! AND DON'T YOU DARE SPEAK TO ME _AGAIN_!" Jiraya shouted at the shaking teen on the floor. He did not notice the shocked look on his face, the hurt in his eyes, nor the forming tears. Naruto stood up and shouted a final

"GOOD!" and Naruto was out the door, leaving a very pissed Jiraya behind.


End file.
